You know that feeling, when you're just sittin' there, minding your own business, being a good football team an' all.... and then this other team comes up and whooops your ass by 6 goals? No? Read on.
In a blur of an hour and a half yesterday, 11 members of the Arsenal squad were left in tears and licking their wounds as; in broad daylight, and under the nose of 30K+ odd people; several wounds were inflicted upon their dignity. "It was rape!", cried one of the onlookers, "I tried to help, I screamed for help! I screamed, but i was helpless. Oh god i was helpless! Why?", he continued as he broke into uncontrollable sobs. Following the debacle that left all of the Arsenal squad grippin' their clothes and fleeing to save any tid-bits of dignity they had left; Arsene Wenger, who was hospitalized following the heavy blows to his dignity, heart and mind, declared that they would press charges of rape and assault against Manchester United, making clear that "stick and stones might break my bones, but raping ain't gonna hurt me *Owww*".
In an ordeal that lasted an hour and a half, the Arsenal players seemed unwary of what was to come as they shared laughs and shook hands with Manchester United players at the start. In events that followed thereafter, several of the players were robbed of their dignity as every Manchester United player lent his hand to make it unforgettable. "They were everywhere, oh them wretched devils! All over me! Aaargh.", sobbed one victim whom the Goalkeeper of the ManU squad had made special efforts to rape, in the box and outside it.
The worst affected in the series of events was none other than the Arsenal goalkeeper himself. As player after player came and went, he was shown little mercy, being raped all over the goal. Following the 4th rape he could be seen, just standing at the goal, not even attempting to move/resist, numb. Defenders gave him little joy as they offered very little resistance to ManU players ganging up on the little polish guy.
Following the gang rape, Arsenal have decided to press charges in a court. "We have rights! They raped us! Raped us of our dignity! IT WAS RAPE!", whimpered the captain of the squad. The charges among st others could include forcefully thrusting themselves upon an underage squad. A very serious offence, as the ManU players mercilessly raped a squad with an average age of 23.6. Old man Rooney was responsible for raping many of the small boys, as he gave the cameras a sly smile later.
The player now are on the road to recover from the physical and mental trauma dealt to them in such a hurry, yet Swansea City were seen licking their lips at the thought of the treat that awaits them. In an attempt to speed up the recovery, Arsenal approached Indian politicians, experts at recovering after constantly having their feet in their mouth. As reports last came in, disappointment awaited the squad here too as they were promptly told,"Foot in the mouth is our forte, we don't deal with a foot in the arse."
In a blur of an hour and a half yesterday, 11 members of the Arsenal squad were left in tears and licking their wounds as; in broad daylight, and under the nose of 30K+ odd people; several wounds were inflicted upon their dignity. "It was rape!", cried one of the onlookers, "I tried to help, I screamed for help! I screamed, but i was helpless. Oh god i was helpless! Why?", he continued as he broke into uncontrollable sobs. Following the debacle that left all of the Arsenal squad grippin' their clothes and fleeing to save any tid-bits of dignity they had left; Arsene Wenger, who was hospitalized following the heavy blows to his dignity, heart and mind, declared that they would press charges of rape and assault against Manchester United, making clear that "stick and stones might break my bones, but raping ain't gonna hurt me *Owww*".
In an ordeal that lasted an hour and a half, the Arsenal players seemed unwary of what was to come as they shared laughs and shook hands with Manchester United players at the start. In events that followed thereafter, several of the players were robbed of their dignity as every Manchester United player lent his hand to make it unforgettable. "They were everywhere, oh them wretched devils! All over me! Aaargh.", sobbed one victim whom the Goalkeeper of the ManU squad had made special efforts to rape, in the box and outside it.
The worst affected in the series of events was none other than the Arsenal goalkeeper himself. As player after player came and went, he was shown little mercy, being raped all over the goal. Following the 4th rape he could be seen, just standing at the goal, not even attempting to move/resist, numb. Defenders gave him little joy as they offered very little resistance to ManU players ganging up on the little polish guy.
Following the gang rape, Arsenal have decided to press charges in a court. "We have rights! They raped us! Raped us of our dignity! IT WAS RAPE!", whimpered the captain of the squad. The charges among st others could include forcefully thrusting themselves upon an underage squad. A very serious offence, as the ManU players mercilessly raped a squad with an average age of 23.6. Old man Rooney was responsible for raping many of the small boys, as he gave the cameras a sly smile later.
The player now are on the road to recover from the physical and mental trauma dealt to them in such a hurry, yet Swansea City were seen licking their lips at the thought of the treat that awaits them. In an attempt to speed up the recovery, Arsenal approached Indian politicians, experts at recovering after constantly having their feet in their mouth. As reports last came in, disappointment awaited the squad here too as they were promptly told,"Foot in the mouth is our forte, we don't deal with a foot in the arse."
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